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The Online Dating Guide – Moving From Internet Chat to Real Life Love

Of course, just because everyone has access to online dating it doesn’t necessarily mean it’s any easier to break the ice, woo a new partner, or find a steady boyfriend/girlfriend. Online dating is still dating, and it’s just as easy to turn someone off via a text message as it is at a bar or nightclub.

When you date online you do have the home field advantage. You might not even feel as nervous as on a face-to-face date since you get to keep a little bit of distance. However, before you get too comfortable and act the cyber-fool, there are a few basics in etiquette and dating strategies to remember.

10 Tips for Successful Online Dating

1. Upload a recent photo of yourself. No one appreciates talking to the you 20 years ago, or the Phantom behind the curtain that never reveals their face. Have the courtesy (and courage!) to show your face in a profile shot.

2. Don’t focus too much on writing an “honest profile”, although lying is never an option. What a lot of inexperienced singles do is ramble on about their life, rather than selling themselves-accentuating their positive qualities. Add a little mystery, a little humor, and a little adventure to your profile description. It shouldn’t read like a police report!

3. Use either a matchmaking online dating site or search for partners that have mutual interests. Searching only by looks and location is not going to find you a “perfect mate.” Narrowing your search down by niche interest is the best way to find a soul mate that shares your values, your interests, and your lifestyle.

4. Put some thought into your opening comments. Don’t ask nosy questions. Don’t say “hi” and wait for a response. Pretend that this is a posh nightclub and that you’re dressed for your movie premiere. You see someone you find attractive and so you walk over like a movie star, confidence beaming, and then you say… (That’s how your conversation should start)

5. Have some fun. Flirt, joke, and ask casual questions with the occasional pop culture reference for some giggles. Too many people make the mistake of treating the online chat like a job interview. Why? Job interviews are boring, stressful and the opposite of fun and spontaneous!

6. Don’t focus too much attention on dark, negative, or painful conversations. (And if you’re even thinking of bringing up your ex, go stand in the corner!) Keep the conversation light and humorous. Exchange thoughts on ideas, philosophy, movies and books, and interesting facts. Avoid any topic that you feel too strongly about, or anything controversial.

7. Spend a few nights talking, sharing photos, video chatting, and surfing the web together. However, when you reach a certain level of trust it’s time to transition from online chat to phone conversation. Staying online forever handicaps your dating progress. You might even be inadvertently friend-zoning yourself, if your online date thinks you’re too afraid to talk on the phone.

8. After you chat on the phone, arrange a time to meet in a neutral location where you can further build trust. This is the ultimate goal of online dating. You don’t want to keep a virtual mistress. You want to make the transition from online date to a real life date, and perhaps onward to a proper love interest!

9. You’re not expected to be “faithful” to an online date, but use some discretion. Don’t instant message (IM) four or five dates at once and accidentally send a message to the wrong person. It makes you look like a player. Or worse yet, like a poor multi-tasker!

10. Be careful about posting any personal information until well after you’ve met in person. It’s easy to cut and paste a profile name, or a full name, into a search engine and stalk someone at any given time.

Online dating is a simulation of a real date, which means there are certain responsibilities you have to keep your partner interested. The online fantasy can only go so far. Turn this “text” into something real.

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